I Don't Have A Husband, I Have A NutritionistKim Roberts
At a gathering last night this woman, Sue, quoted her husband, so I said, "I don't have a husband, I have a nutritionist," and quoted her. Someone asked what you'd call a group of nutritionists, and I said, not a flock or a horde, and Michael suggested a "buzzkill of nutritionists" and I'm sorry Lynda, I did not defend you or your venerable profession; instead I told them counting sodium intake was the newest torture you'd devised for me. Oh, how we malign those we love! I did not say your specialty is cancer and nutrition-- that would have shut them up-- and how you've helped me through a strange and difficult time. Instead I laughed with the others when Dan brought up Michael Pollan, whose book The Omnivore's Dilemma my nutritionist and I actually read together. Inevitably, someone mentioned the French; someone else spoke of the foolishness of needing professionals to tell us how to eat. Forgive me, Lynda, I turned you into a character, as Sue always does with her husband, a man none of us has met, allegedly a curmudgeon and a clown, and probably someone she can't live without.
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